My son

I’ll start from the beginning, and try to help you understand
How God has a reason for everything, and for everyone he has a plan.


On the 29th day of December, of my sophomore year, the year 2001
Life for me as I had known it changed, For God had blessed me with a son

Malachi Jamal Moore, a name truly fit for a king
I never could’ve guessed or imagined all the lessons and joy this little boy could bring


You see Malachi was little, just barely two pounds
But he was strong, and he was a fighter, nothing could hold him down
He had many complications, some big, and some small
But he always kept a smile that helped his mommy bare it all

He never got a chance to crawl, walk, or those little things that babies do
And he and I both went through some things that some of you may never go through
He never got a chance to come home, but he always knew that his mommy would always be there
To be his comfort and strength, and to show him that she cared

He only lived 19 months, on August the 4th he was called home
To sit in the arms of God, or maybe in his own baby throne
What you don’t understand is the message I’m trying to teach
About how my little baby had a message he was sent to preach

You see the name Malachi means God’s messenger, and he bought a message full of power
It simply says, “God is coming for his people, but no one knows the day or hour”

Malachi was sent here to teach a few things like how to truly love
And how to focus not on things of this world, but on Almighty God above
His time was short, his purpose was met, and all the pain is gone
I understand now, and now I am strong, and now I must press on

Growth

Thank you Creator for growth
My feminine energy is no longer suppressed
Now free to do what I was called to do
No longer will I digress

From relaxed and straightened with a little slicked down to the side
To a low cut well shaped up beauty who rocks her natural with pride
From a size three olive oil type chick with big feet
To a size 12 fluffy the body type chick with a little extra mama meat

Thank you Creator for growth
My feminine energy is no longer suppressed
Now free to do what I was called to do
No longer will I digress


From fresh beaters
To v neck dresses
From quick washes with Dove
To elaborate showers with citrus ginger fragrances
From corporate cubes and navy blue slacks
To sexy black ensembles with accessories to match

Thank you Creator for growth
My feminine energy is no longer suppressed
Now free to do what I was called to do
No longer will I let myself digress

From being lost in the world and trying to find my way
To being spiritually grounded on the Creator and learning how to pray
From Geek squad and confusing computer terms
To natural hair guru with the gift of gab and the power to free my people from perms

Thank you Creator for growth
My feminine energy is no longer suppressed
Now free to do what I was called to do
No longer will I let myself digress

From single parent having to play both roles
To being called baby, boo, the mate of his soul
From a boring life full of all work and no play
To a life filled with creativity being expressed everyday

Yes………..Thank You Creator for growth
My feminine energy is no longer suppressed
Now free to do what I am called to do
No longer will I let myself digress……

Locked Down Lover

I can't sit here and pretend that I don't wonder how you are doing

Even though I have someone to call my own

I hated to cut things off so abruptly

but that was the only way that both you and I could grow

We shared many love letters and Polaroid pictures through mail

but that just wasn't enough

I needed someone next to me to help me live my life

someone to physically hold me when my days got to be tough

Please don't hate me or cast me into the category of lost loves

I hope that I much more than a bad thought

But please hold and cherish the memories that we had

and know that you held a special place in my heart

I grew tired of the bag searches, limited visitation, and sounds of bars closing

and leaving the facility feeling as if I would forever be a visitor on your list

I grew tired of calling and telling my friends about the man that I adored

When I knew in my heart that I hated all of the family events that you would miss

I needed more than just words on paper in envelopes biweekly

I needed you to be free to live life out here with me

But you couldn't give me that because of the choices that you made

and I had to move on and see the reality

I loved you when you were here

and cried when I didn't know where you had gone

and felt relieved when I found out that you were alive

and felt discouraged when I had to love you from afar

So I can't sit here and pretend that you do not cross my mind

Sometimes I want to write and make sure that you are okay

but I do not want to open up that door that I fought so hard to close

no matter what my thoughts might say

So goodbye I say to you my locked down love of the past

Know that the memories we shared were not in vain

I found that happiness that you and I once discussed

and I've learned how to heal from the pain

I hope that you are reformed, refreshed and renewed when they decide to set you free

and if our paths should cross again, I hope that you are not filled with resentment

but take all that you have learned over the years and find a new life …....and live it

Finally accepting the writer in me

Okay. I've finally decided to add the title writer/poet to my list of words to describe myself. I am making a commitment to writing a novel, writing more poems, and blogging more often about anything that comes to mind. Please feel free to comment on my poems.

Doing Hair in Atlanta

For those of you who don't know, I just recently moved to Atlanta, Ga for no reason in particular. I am currently working at a salon called Deeply Rooted which is a really awesome place to work. I meet a lot of interesting people who have interesting ways of talking. I had two clients last week who were teaching me some slang, and I honestly felt like I was really old. These guys where only about six or seven years younger than me.


So here is the slang that I learned so far.....

" A Big dog yo dreds is Fi(Fire without the re)
Translation: "Your locs look Hot" of "your locs look nice".....lol
"He's lurkin"
Translation: He's checking himself out in the mirror"


Okay that was funny.

I also tell people that I just moved down from Maryland near Baltimore, and the first thing that they ask me about is the wire.

Okay until later.

The first Post

Okay so I know that I have picked a very corny first post title, but it's better than nothing at all. Anyway, I am new to this whole blogging thing, but I as a Gemini I always have so many thoughts running through my head, i figured that blogging would be the best method for releasing these thoughts that I have.

Let me first give you a break down of who I think I am from a Gemini perspective. I am a very flighty free spirit who loves talking and getting to know people. I like to take a walk in others shoes in order to get a good idea of who they are and how he/she views life. I will try anything once and I like to start projects that may or may not get finished( hopefully not this blog :)

Okay now I can begin. I know officially have many titles. I am a mother, step-mother, wife, natural hair stylist, P.S.G ( Poet Still Growing), eldest child, eldest grandchild on my mom's side, and many others that I don't feel like mentioning. I think that today I will talk about my newest title.....wife.

As a young girl I never dreamed of getting married in a fancy church, in a big expensive white dress, with all of my family and friends in attendance. As a young woman I could never imagine being committed to someone for the REST OF MY LIFE. Now that I have taken that step, I can honestly say that I enjoy marriage. What's even more exciting is the fact that he is also a Gemini, which means that he always understands what I am thinking and why I am thinking it. I enjoy being a wife, whatever that means, but I'm still trying to figure out if I am supposed to feel different. At times I wonder if the husband feels any different than he did before when we were shacking.....lol. Anyway....that's all for now. Gotta put the kids to bed.....